Great Expectations!
Sorry, I know you may have been “expecting” a book review on Great Expectations! I really do like books and writing reviews, but this is not about a book. This post is about life….my expectations of this life and how they don’t always make sense.
I’ve realized over a period of time and some life lessons that my expectations of others and for my life are way too high at times. I am very good at grading every moment and person with a pass/fail grade. Maybe this is something you can identify with….
- Putting people on pedestals and expecting them to stay there; having grand ideas when it comes to their character and how they should act.
- Expecting to control certain parts of life: how it should go, what it should be like, what should be received related to how hard I work.
Okay…maybe that’s just me! It became a default for me…I could put moments in my life and people in the #fail category. Just like a twitter post….this person did this, #fail…..life didn’t go the way I was “expecting”, #fail.
I read recently that a world-wide study ranked people in Denmark as the most content population in the world. When one citizen was being interviewed a reporter made the comment that people from the United States would be moving there in droves. The man responded that Americans would just be disappointed. When pressed by the reporter on why people were so content….the man said…we have low expectations. It bears thought that lower expectations might translate to less disappointment.
Being disappointed leads me to frustration and then my old friend-anger-always shows up. I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that I think most people don’t like being disappointed. I think I can count that as being a true statement. What is different? The way people handle disappoint. Some people are able to handle it with a whole lot more grace than others. I wonder if that’s related to personality, where you are in life, or just how you relate things to your life? Or, could it be about expectations? Do American’s have expectations that are too high? All things I’ve been contemplating.
I’m glad that I’ve made some adjustment in my life-to not run but to stand and face my demons head on….and talk about them to people who value me as a person. It’s never easy to talk about where you fail, but talking with someone you know-who loves you and has your back and who you trust….that’s a really good thing. As 2010 unfolds my hope is I learn to “lower” my insanely high expectations and break the destructive cycle of disappointment into anger. I understand I couldn’t do any of this without God and His desire for a relationship with me. Oh, and that wonderful thing called grace. I hope that He finds me delightfully wacky and I am grateful for the joy I feel even in the midst of some of life’s harder moments!
6 Comments
Great post. I am starting to learn some of those lessons too. I find in many situations, that I have placed a person above God (idolatry) to the extent that I expect them to be perfect. Only God is perfect. We can set ourselves up for disappointment when we place “great expectations” upon the people we are around. Thank God for His grace, especially because I (we all) need it more than that other person.
YES! Lower expectations! Does this mean I don’t have to do laundry, or dishes, or the “honey do” list?
Thanks for the reminder that we often expect others to behave/perform/respond (fill in your favorite here) the same way that we do. Unfortunately, that can be recipe for disaster! We are all created wonderfully unique and even though it may be difficult sometimes, our way is not always the best (or only) way!
Good post. IRONIC, isn’t it? God has massive expectations for His children and His church. BUT, He wants us to be relaxed about IT because we are to rely ENTIRELY on Him to allow these expectations to come to fruition. This is all about trust in God to provide. Also, if something fails, instead of frustration, we can figure it was our idea instead of God’s will. Relaxing, abiding. And, you should be able to trust that Michael will take the trash out at least once in 2010! HAHA
Love Love Love it!!! Wow how much our expectations control our lives! So true….I have to remember that God is in control so control and to let go of the High Expectations that my Husband and Family can never live up to. Only God will never fail me! That was such a hard lesson for me to learn and so glad you reminded me! Thanks for sharing!
I don’t know if it is lowered expectations or not but being able to effectivley deal with life’s uncertain and unexpected situations is a skill set that is great to have! In America we are taught to expect instant results. Advertising and the media in general would like you to believe that all problems are worked out in 30 minute episodes!
Next time you hear of a tradgedy in a third world country take time to notice how they react. Being tied to the Philippines like I am I always watch with great interest when there is a natural disaster or some calamity that comes over the news. If you watch they face their trouble with a smile and a positive outlook!
In the western world we always try to insulate ourselves from reality. We do it through achieving comfort and ease in almost every area of life. When reality comes we struggle with it because our expectations are not rooted in the real world. I also wish I had the patience that other cultures have. It would make life a little more tolerable for us but most importantly for the people that have to put up with us! Thanks for a thought provoking post!
Thanks for all the great feedback. Your comments always give me added thoughts or a new perspective on things. You guys are all amazing and important in some way to my life. Kind of IRONIC that one can find community in the oddest places…… Like a little blog in the middle of cyber-space! That just goes to show you that “lower expectations” and the smallest of life’s details can bring you moments of great joy.